19 April 2012

gosh! thank you! {+ hormonal ramblings}

Sorry no photo today, I don't get much chance to take pictures at work at the mo : (

I just wanted to say a HUGE massive thank you to all the lovely peep's comments on my last post, I never expected such a reaction...its soooo lovely!
I feel so much support from people I have never even met, its kind of fabulously bonkers!
And, so many of you soon to be mums too! Definitely something in the air ; )  best wishes to you x.

On a different subject...
I have had many comments saying 'I knew you were Pregnant' and yes indeed I was!

I have actually had many exactly the same comments on my blog/real life in the last few years too, when I was definitely NOT preggo, so I think peeps are just eager for me to get up the duff for some reason.

If I missed a blog post or mentioned that I was ill or knackered, its like 'youre pregnant aren't you' ...geeze, embarrassing!

When I first got married, people would ask me ALL the time when we are having kids, and I hated it. Its kind of personal, and some people don't want/cant have/haven't even talked about having kids yet, and I feel very sorry for people who have to explain something so difficult/personal when put on the spot.

I guess we have all done this at some point in our lives and I now regret asking. Being not much of the 'baby' type, {I don't go gooey over other people babies like others seem to do} I was always hoping other friends would feel the same unsure way as I did when I was younger.

I'm really looking forward to being a mum now though, I cant wait! But I'm not really looking forward to the 'so when are you going to have another one?' questions to come later. Or, ' I couldn't see your stomach in the last post, are you pregnant again?' comments, humpf!!

I would love to know how you feel about this? or is it just me being a numpty?

Anyways, enough of this ranting...we are working on lots of new samples at RUST, its all very exciting involving lots of diamonds and other sparkly goodness. I will report back soon with evidence.

Much love to you all! {and I wasn't offended by anyones comments BTW, as I am now actually preggers!} x


  1. I have always been unsure as to whether I want children and am kind of fascinated that some women are so sure from such a young age. I agree that it's a deeply personal thing to each person, and some people ask all the time (perhaps without meaning any harm) about when you want kids/how many/what age you want them etc etc. I'm not sure why we are all so fascinated by other people's choices, but we are!

  2. Congratulations:)
    I have many friends having baby or a mom already. I also don't like that they keep asking me when is my turn.
    Such a very personal issue. And just feel like people pushing you to a baby tend:)

  3. Oh love! I think you've hit so many nails on the head... people just like to be in others' business.
    I am very happy for you and can't wait to enjoy what you choose to share with us! Rust Baby ahoy!

    Hope you're feeling good!

  4. I don't think you're being numpty. My hubs and I were married 10 years before we had kids. Everyone had given up on asking at that point. But it did drive me craaaaazy that people asked. None of your darn business! And yes, people will ask when you're having the next one as soon as your first baby is sitting up and taking solids. (!)

    And it took me a looong time to come around to the idea. I was 31 when I had my first.

    You and Nao seem to lead lives of such great intention that it seems that you will be good parents. Those of us who know that it is a big step (to become a parent) tend to go into it with eyes wide open and knowing that it will be lovely and challenging all at the same time.

    All the best to you and Nao and your little sprout!

  5. Anonymous19.4.12

    I am very happy for you. I am so old that I could be your mother. i don't have any children. It never seemed to be the right moment to have one and then suddenly and so quickly the biological clock said it was too late for me. Enjoy your pregnancy and don't worry too much about other people's questions.
    Lots of love
    Ps. My nephew married a japanese girl and they have 2 children They are beautiful ad they can speak japanese!

  6. I agree with you, it's annoying to be told "when you are going to have babies" or "so when you are going to have the second one". Whaaat??? as if you must have a second one. We choose to have just one because we know our limits (in terms of age, money and patience, yes patience let's no be hypocritical about it, kids test your patience aaaa loooot). To have or not to have children is no-one business apart yourself and your partner.
    And don't even get me started with the "so when are you getting married?" argh!!! I lived 6 years with my partner before WE decided to get married and when we did it it was the time of the "finally he made you a decent woman!!!" how crazy is this? So yep, I never assume anything with anybody and be reassured that you will never ever ever receive such comments from me! :D Now, enjoy your pregnancy and feel the love! ciao

  7. Congratulations! I felt exactly the same as you but I can tell you that being a mum is the best thing in the world!
    So happy for you bothx

  8. Congratulations! That's lovely news, even though I've never met you I've been flowing your blog for over a year now so it feels even more special to read about it. Looking forward to seeing your vintage toys being put to good use xx

  9. I got married very young (20 years old!) and I think most folks assumed I was pregnant then. I wasn't and I didn't want to be. The hubs and I have been married for 6 years and I'm still not sure I ever want children.

    I get pestered about it all the time and I for one don't like it.

    So no worries, you won't get blog pestered by me ;)

  10. It's a sad truth; but now you are going to be asked so many ANNOYING questions, and you will be (very freely) given so much advice you don't really want. Sometimes you can/will let it wash over you but other times you might want to punch someone! I wish I'd kept a chart of the sex predictions for my children - and maybe asked for a quid from everyone that guessed to go into a big sweepstake/draw, that might have made that particular ordeal easier.

  11. Georgia19.4.12

    Utterly absolutely couldn't agree more! How rude it is for people you usually don't know that well to ask those questions. I wasn't that keen on the idea of children, and I often find myself thinking fondly about how life might be if I didn't have the little darlings! They make you scream and shout and you would never believe you could be so tired. But - I think they make you a better person in a lot of ways. Less self-centred, harder working, with a better perspective on what matters (ie them and not a lot else!). And they are SO much fun - new friends to dance round the kitchen with!

  12. Vicki19.4.12

    Congratulations! I couldn't agree more with you, I don't understand why people think it's ok to keep asking! My younger sister has been married for a year and is so fed up of people assuming she must be 'trying' she's taken to always carrying a large glass of wine!!

  13. Yes, you've really hit on some good points. Whenever someone asks me when I'm going to have babies (not yet!) I always think about my friends who CAN'T or don't EVER want one... if it feels crummy to have people always asking about this, how must it feel to others for whom it is a much more tender subject? Sick of people thinking that women's reproductive choices are everyone's business. And as a woman who doesn't get gooey about babies and wasn't sure until recently that I even wanted a child - I hear you on that point, too.

    AND! Congratulations!!

  14. I also feel the same. I feel so sad when I think there are so many people who would do anything to have become parents aand the questions and the agony they must go through. I feel it is part of the norm in the society and it is not the easiest task to follow your path, if you choose not to have children or if you choose not to know the sex of your baby. There always seems to be a norm for everything. It is always healthy I belive to think what is best for us and me, and then just follow your heart. I was also shocked of all the questions regarding having babies when I got married...
    I'm still very happy about your babay-news!!!

  15. I think you're quite right to be bothered by such comments. What bothered me the most is when we WERE pregnant, but we were keeping it a secret and planning to surprise our families on Father's Day. It was like, "When I want you to know that I'm pregnant, you'll know because I'LL BE TELLING YOU."

  16. Jennifer19.4.12

    I agree that this can be a tender subject. As a 38 year old single woman I do on occasion get comments about babies and about how I feel about not having one. Ultimately I think that if I really wanted one I might be doing more to put myself in situations where I might at least have the chance of meeting a lovely man to start a family with. I realised recently, however, that my feelings on the topic are not straight-forward when my sister asked me out of the blue in a cheery, conversational tone whether I have any regrets about not having a baby. I felt sad, irritated and confused all at once and it was as if someone had just blasted a loud and unwelcome burst of music in my ear. Sorry if that's a bit dramatic but it's how I felt. I'm in a different situation from you but I still identify strongly with your views on this. For me, even family (or especially family?) would do well to be a bit more sensitive on occasion.

  17. I too got fed up with being asked and told that 'the biological clock is ticking'. I got to the point where I did actually say 'for all you know we may not be able' - sure shut him up!
    Anyhow - you're ready when you're ready. Only advice - when your friends with kids try to share birth stories - stick your fingers in your ears and hum real loud. Best thing for a happy baby is a happy and relaxed pregnancy.

  18. Ha ha, it's really annoying isn't it, the second you get married everyone is hanging out for the baby! We were the same, about a year after we got married we told everyone we had a little bit of news, everyone started gushing "Oh MY GOD, A BABY"!! And we were like "um no, we're just moving to Australia"! We did get our chance to shock everyone though when we announced I was pregnant with our third when our second was only 6 moths old :-) It's no-one's business and yes I agree it must be hard for people having difficulties conceiving to deal with insensitive eager questioning, I think people reading your blog feel they kinda know you in a way and your and Nao's life has such a romantic quality to it people have been thinking a little baby would be such a beautiful addition to your lovely family :-)

  19. Wow, belated greetings!! You and Nao will be great parents!

    When I was pregnant what I found most odd was how strangers in the street starting talking to me about my unborn child.

    I've been a single mom from the start, so instead of "are you pregnant again?" I got "when are you going to find your baby a new daddy?". People have stopped asking though, so it doesn't really bother me :) but then again, I'm a single mom and try to spend all my time with my kid so people don't really have the opportunity to ask.

    I wasn't much of a 'baby' type either and didn't plan for this, but I do get more gooey over other people babies now, maybe it reminds me of the time when my kid was tiny and vulnerable.

  20. Hi Artemis,
    Love the last picture of the bitty sweater and scarf! Your baby is going to have sweet style I'm sure.

    I agree with you, I have been through the 'so your next?' with regards to being a bridesmaid and therefore obv going to be married shortly thereafter (no, it was almost a decade later!), and now, yes, about children...I really appreciate your sense of privacy with regards to such things and feel much the same way. Except for that I am one of those people who can't get enough of babies. It's a mystery to me but true nonetheless...I work with them, volunteer with them, hold my friends' and family babies willingly...Which in a way means that the questions come up even more often...sigh.
    Wishing you a wonderful pregnancy!

  21. *squeal*!!! OMG! How did I miss your previous post. Congratulations to the both of you! And yes I knew it! ;-) AHHHHH how lovely... will little one be getting their own shed? hmmm

  22. We agree that it is something so personal. Two of us had babies very late in life and the youngest one hasn't been able to. Hard when people think it is ok to ask or make you feel bad for not having children. It is such a personal thing... but we are very happy for you! X

  23. Anonymous19.4.12

    Reading your blog today was like reading something I would write. My gorgeous husband and I have been married twenty five years, like you I wasn't gooey about children. As soon as we were married I was frequently questioned as to when I was going to start a family......it was five years before we had our daughter. Well meaning people often lack any sensitivity when it comes to asking the baby question and it has made me very careful never to do the same. My daughter is now twenty and has been a pure delight, most of the time (!) but I still had to put up with the enquiries about adding another child to the family for at least eight years after she was born........so be prepared! My only little bit of advice.......take lots of photos of yourself in pregnancy because the changes are worth celebrating and remembering forever! Katherine x

  24. Anonymous19.4.12

    Congratulations! Lovely news. I completely agree about people asking inappropriate questions. We struggled to conceive and went through fertility treatment (now have amazing baby girl - am so lucky) and although close friends and family knew, it was people I barely knew would always ask. "when you having babies? Don't leave it too long!" i could have screamed "I don't want to talk to you about my reproductive system!!" I was the same once, and now kick myself for asking people just to make conversation. I just hope I didn't do too much harm.

    Love your blog, have been reading for many years. Thank you for writing. I hope the sickness has passed and get them feet up girl!

    Best wishes to you x

  25. Congrats again...I find you attitude refreshing and agree that the 'so when are you having children/do you have any children' question is a nightmare as my husband and I are 'childless parents' and are struggling to have another baby and like you say, it is a very personal thing and strangers just seem to think that they have the right to ask this question.
    It is nice to read this post and find that our thoughts on children/pregnancy are similar and that there are others who feel the same way too; thank you discussing and congrats once again :)

  26. Very well put. I certainly put enough pressure on myself without others joining in, thank-you-very-much! Just be prepared for strangers in the street passing personal comments ("My you are big!" etc). It really is quite astonishing. If this post is anything to go by, you will handle it well.
    Get loads of rest!

  27. Congratulations to you both on your happy news!
    Love the little outfit in the last post, your baby will look so cute!

  28. I got married six months ago and lots of people at work have had children recently and feel the need to tell me to make the most of my young age yet my boss who also married recently too and is ten years older, she got told by someone that she should try as soon as she can as it's not a quick process!! How rude and presumptuous that we aren't already trying! I also in invited my family over recently and had a baggy dress on. My sister in law announced that she thought we had invited everyone round to say we're pregnant especially as I had baggy dress on!! They had been keeping an eye on what I ordered at the pub too. Ridiculous!! So yes I totally agree with what you said :)

  29. Well put i salute you! I'm sick of people asking me the same questions. Im engaged to my partner who i've been with for 7years and reaching the grand old age of 26 people suddenly start asking "So when you having a baby then? arent you haveing one yet? if not why not? I feel like screaming at them mind your own bloody business and it has often crossed my mind as you said the poor people who have trouble concieving and who cant have children, its such a personal question and it really is no one elses business. Any how enough of that and just for the record i am NOT pregnant and you Are so Congrats again and i hope you enjoy every second of it.

  30. Stephanie20.4.12

    Wow wow wow, this is such wonderful news!!!! I have been reading your blog for quite some time and have always been waiting and hoping for this announcement :) You guys will be absolutely wonderful parents for sure! What a lucky little bugger! Congratulations!!!

    Well, I was never into kids and babies either, was forever single, quickly getting close to 40, so luckily people never asked me about having babies (I guess they assumed it would never happen?!). Last year it did happen and boy, did it change my outlook on life! Now, nothing else matters! Esp people asking silly questions, ha!

    It did take me quite some months to get used to the idea...but then the prospect of having a little companion in life made me so happy and content. I totally enjoyed being preggo!(apart from the sickness in the beginning).
    Being a mom and having a fantastic partner makes me feel so lucky and blessed. When people ask me if I think of having another (bub is 9months now), instead of being shocked it makes me think...hmm, actually that would be really nice! :o

    So I'd like to say enjoy this wonderful time, take many pics of the bump (I regret not having a nice documentation of that time), pamper yourself and all the best!! S x

  31. Congratulations!! I actually meant to comment on your previous post...but I was distracted by my 12 week old little monkey!! I have a toddler too and can honestly say - enjoy the baby moon...Once they start walking and talking { words such as ‘NO!’} then it’s a whole other kettle of fish!! Hope you’re over the sickness and get as much rest as you can. x

  32. Oh yes I'd been wondering when you were going to do a new collection with diamonds, and whether you'd thought about getting another cat. I knew after your first shed you'd want another. And I knew that getting that big vehicle would make you want to get a little one - oh we're all so predictable aren't we!!?

  33. I have been on my hols to the New Forest so i am just catching up on posts.

    Big congratulations to you both!!!

    Keep well and sleep as much as you can now!!


  34. Anonymous20.4.12

    I always knew I wanted children but in the end it took us 6 years to finally conceive (with a little bit of help!) & in that time we must have seen at least 20 other children born around us, we were thrilled for each & every one of them obviously but each 1 felt like another stab in the heart, we were constantly being asked 'ooh, when are you 2 going to start?!' or 'don't you want any of your own?' (we fostered 14 children in between so I think people thought we weren't interested!)I feel incredibly blessed to now be expecting twins sometime around my 36th birthday this year & I still can't quite believe it! Enjoy every minute & I agree, take lots of photos of your growing tummy, it's beautiful! much love, Leah xxx

  35. Anonymous20.4.12

    Congrats Artemis!

    It's amazing isn't how surprising rude people can be when the subject of babies comes up...

    I myself am in a long term relationship (just got engaged last summer - got one of your beautiful rings!) and me and my partner are both in our thirties but do not have a massive urge to have any little one's just yet...even though all our friends are having them...we love our little nieces and nephews but just are not ready for our own yet so it's a little hurtful when people treat us as if there is something wrong with us...

    Anyway, I am so happy for you and I wish you lots of good luck on your new adventure as a mum... what fun you will have! :-) You are such a great role model, lucky little one to have a mum and dad like the two of you!

  36. Lesley Owens20.4.12

    I really enjoy your blog - it makes me want to make the leap myself! It must be strange getting messages from strangers but I wanted to add to them and say a big congratulations! I suppose you follow peoples' stories on their blogs and you two seem like a lovely couple. Wishing you all the best for your pregnancy x

  37. Hi Artemis,
    People are funny creatures. Some people seem to be missing the bit in the brain that monitors the thoughts that one should actually speak out loud. People do make very personal comments when you are pregnant. There are a lot of irritating ones that do your head in. The man on the checkout in Asda started asking if we were working against the clock, meaning is baby coming along now I think??? I was only 6 months!
    But after Eliska came along, I got chatting to some people who said the right things, if you know what I mean. Sometimes complete strangers were really lovely and kind and compassionate.
    Try to ignore the dafties. They are the numpties, God love 'em.
    Take care xxx

  38. Some say that are not maternal and yet I have seen so many of them turn into doting mothers after they meet their child...I can only imagine your mother-in-waiting posts...it's going to be a scream I am sure. Looking forward to meeting your vintage babe. Congrats Artemis and Nao :)

  39. Shine the nosey ones on! Funny, when I've been open and honest, people actually clam up a bit. So many are compelled to ask personal questions, but don't know what to do when you actually answer. Changing the subject works too. Don't waste too much energy on these words that feel violating. Just live YOUR life. Ignore it all if you need to. Focus on your passions... Good wishes to you and yours.

  40. Oh thank goodness its not just me! You all have me deepest sympathy x

    The truth is that no one knows they can actually have kids until they actually get pregnant, so I find it an odd question on that level too.

    It seems from a lot of comments on my last post that everyone knew I was going to get pregnant...wow! They must know a lot more than me then!

    I think the hormones have caused me to not contain my opinions anymore...I'd better watch out I don't upset anyone ; )

  41. I am pregnant now and at the very beginning was very sick, I wish I had a pound for each time someone said 'oh it won't be like this the second time!'. Both my husband and I found this very annoying, we weren't sure we could have children at all and the last thing on our minds at that point was doing it all over again. I wish people would just think a bit before opening their mouths! x

  42. Yay! Congratulations! He/She is going to be one gorgeous kid ;) and dressed in the best vintage togs i'm sure x

  43. Anonymous21.4.12

    I am someone who had always loved babies and children of all ages, and want nothing more than to be a mother. That being said, I think your reaction and feelings are completely normal. It is a very serious and personal topic, and most people dont even know if they want a child or children. You need not worry, you are normal! :)

  44. i am with you...we waited almost six years after we married before having our first and then almost five before having another...i know people in our lives were wondering...but for the most part they let us do our thing...at some point it just felt right to have the family grow...don't worry about what questions will come...just enjoy the moment...so excited for you!

  45. Congratulation Artemis!!! :D

  46. Saskia23.4.12

    Congratulations to you & Nao on your lovely news.
    Obviously we all understand that people are only asking (or hoping) about pregnancies/babies because they're happy events, but I can't even imagine how hard it must be to be asked about it when you're trying unsuccessfully.
    I was asked AT MY WEDDING. Still in the dress, not even had our first dance, when will we be trying for a baby?! Heck.
    It's as personal as asking about someone's sex life, 'so are you using condoms?' After 2 years of marriage, I will now be informing anyone who asks that 'oh no, we're only doing it up the bum to make sure that doesn't happen'. Go away with your personal questions, nosey work colleague.
    Sorry, that was mega ranty. I'm so pleased for you, and totally agree with and appreciate your honesty in this post x

  47. Ha ha! Saskia you made me nearly choke on my breakfast!! Hilarious x

  48. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I´m in my mid-thirties and I can´t have kids of my own. I think I have been asked the kids-question for 10 years now and haven´t found a way deal with it yet. Lately I am compelled to just say the truth, but that would trigger the whole "aw you poor thing but there´s always adoption" speech, and that is even worse. I hope that one day people will learn that this is something very personal and also that it is a real choice to have kids these days (so no need to ask WHEN someone is going to have kids). Anyway one reason to look forward to being an old hag eventually when nobody expects me to have kids anymore ;)
    Sorry for the rant. I am, however, delighted for you. Congratulations, you will be such cool parents!

  49. Lots of people seem to think you are pubic property when pregnant and ask to stroke your bump ... they wouldn't do it if you weren't pregnant would they? You'll be a fantastic Mum, congratulations! xxx

  50. Totally understand the not being a baby kind of person thing. I struggled to wrap my head around having kids of my own. Now I'm pregnant, I still have days where I'm very uncertain. I'm really excited and happy most of the time, but gosh, it's a big thing to have kids, huh? And as for other people... just shrug and let it roll off your back. You're totally right about how intrusive it is to ask couples when they will have a baby, not knowing if they are trying or not, nor for how long. Well said xx

  51. Anonymous25.4.12

    Hey, we're due similar times - early Autumn, me. My boss told me today that he was 'laughing today with another colleague about my 'hmmph' attitude to motherhood'. That cheesed me off - I am really happy to be having a baby, thrilled even, but its not the only thing I want to achieve in life, and I'm not just all gooey and rose-tinted glasses about it. Doesn't mean I have an 'attitude', does it?! I do quite like saying 'oh, its not his' when my other-half is congratulated, and 'no, it was a horrible mistake' when asked if we planned it. Congratulations! were you trying? ;)

  52. Ha ha! Anonymous, I think we are both singing from the same hymn sheet! I might use some of your phrases next time I'm asked!

    I'm due early autumn too...
    All the best x

  53. Anonymous27.4.12

    Hello I Just wanted to congratulate you too and say I how much I enjoyed this post. I'm like you it sounds, in the way I don't want to discuss my baby thoughts and feelings with the whole world that thinks it's their right to know exactly what's going on in my and my partner's heads! Lovely news though I'm really pleased for you both :)

  54. emmaku27.4.12

    So nice to read the comments above! We got married last summer and have lost count of the times babies have been mentioned. I'd never thought of asking friends WHEN they will have a baby and now I never will - such an impossible question to answer. If you say yes everyone will be waiting and saying no or 'we're not ready' yet makes people surprised/frustrated/grumpy!

  55. Wow! I've been away in India for the last 3 weeks and just logged on to check out my fav blogs - of course yours is one of them - and read your fantastic news! Congratulations to both of you! I have two kids, my son just arrived two months ago, so I'll look forward to all the baby related posts to come!

    On another note, I was once asked if I was "barren" ... that's right, barren! It was quite embarrassing and, really, what do you say to that!?

  56. Congrats on your pregnancy! I love your ideas and your photography...I'll be back soon!

  57. So this is really good news and also thanks for sharing with your viewer i am so inspired here with you.
    Thanks for posting...

    Garden centre in York

  58. Anonymous4.5.12

    'Is it a girl or a boy?'
    'Both, actually - its XXY, we don't have to decide its sex till its at least nine or ten years old'
    [Embarrassed silence]

    Couldn't resist...

  59. i can imagine how beatiful the babys room is going to be, with a mother with such nice taste :)
    lots of stretching now!
    besos desde Lima, Peru.

  60. Children bring joy in life! Whether you’re a man or a woman, having a kid can completely change your world and transform you as a person. Wish you happy times ahead!



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