10 August 2010

wedding thinking

{photo from here}

My wedding dress was made in the same year that this couple also wed, 1931. I know this because the lady I bought it from, told me that it was her mothers dress. The dress was sent from Swansea, which is nice seeing as I have a bit of Welsh blood from my Grandma too!
I hope she doesn't/wouldn't mind me re-designing it a bit and wearing it for my wedding too? I like the idea of wearing a bit of history, and also saving a bit of money, not too mention being totally eco friendly {well, except the electricity used to power my sewing machine that is!}.

So, we get married this Saturday at 12pm, and I'm so unexplainable excited about it all!
My parents and grandparents are divorced and nobody else in my family is married, so you can understand that maybe marriage has a different meaning to me than some others perhaps. I don't believe that being married somehow makes a relationship 'real' or more important to those who are not married, in fact I worry for those who maybe getting married too quickly or for the wrong reasons, but who am I to judge other people any way!

Nao and I are quite phobic of showing emotions outwardly infront of people, so the whole idea of standing up and parading ourselves is a bit, well, alien to us and kind of awkward. I want to make the wedding as light hearted as possible, as really I feel the main aim of the day is to get all our friends and family to meet and have a jolly good day, and see us {informally and un-religiously} tie the knot!

We have run a business together for almost 8 years now, working sometimes all through the night, and sometimes in other countries {but lately mostly at the antiques market!} so we feel pretty much committed to each other already. In fact, we probably spend at least twice as much time together as most working couples, so in that respect we are lucky and maybe that makes us a bit more bonded together! Not to mention all the other pressures and scary moments that running your own business can produce.

For me, {and i think Nao too} Marriage is a very personal thing, that is just about us, and which we do not have to explain or justify to anyone, and anyway, I cannot describe in words what it means!
Partly, because we are from opposite sides of the world originally, other couples who are the same nationality may never have to encounter a separation due to legal issues or national conflict or immigration controls. Although Nao has gained {after alot of hard work and worry} a permanent right to stay in this country, it still feels like we are not in 100% complete control of our own destinies, and marriage provides a solid block against any government requirements that could split us up.
Also, it just feels right to get married at this point and this I definitely CANNOT explain what on earth I mean by that! maybe I am looking forward to not calling him 'boyfriend' which make me feel like I am 15 or something!

So enough of my ramblings, there is so much to get done and we are leaving for the Isle of Wight tomorrow at 4am!!! as we have to go to the flower market first thing and snap up some cheap blooms to take down with us.

I shall see you all on the other side of marrydom!
By for now X